Frust

Hey blog ! Long time no update , i miss my blog . Already been 5 days didn't update my blog . Now i will update and for the reader i'm sorry for not update my blog for a few day got family events . I'm suffering for these few days because i got a lot of problem , problem with son , problem with my sickness , problem about next year *sigh . . I think a lot at night that's why i can't sleep . Think about myself , son , study and much more .. I can't stop my own brain from thinking , it just keep thinking *sigh . Now the new problem is son didn't reply my message and answer call from me for 4 days include today . I can't think what is son reason for doing that . And what he do is making me suffer and lost my direction . I'm all alone again , no smile when i wake up , no one say good night or sweet dream to me , ask me to eat my medicine , ask about my health and the mostly i miss is no one call me MUMMY SEPET anymore . That make me sad =(  but i must be patient . . Now i and son don't know as what relationship . I totally BLUR . Allah , help me ! When i'm my dad workplace , i eat a lot of durian and i got a high fever but i didn't care much about my fever , just let it be LOL . Then i save some durian because i want to make durian cake . YUMMY ! I'm quite big eater but hard for me to get fat .. hehe ! Dunno why . Kind of freak . But what didn't i care . On Christmas Day , me and my family went to Lahad Datu , my mom buy one short sleeves t-shirt for me , is a Starbucks Tee . I totally love it . Thank Q , mom ! I'm totally lost now , i can't be the person that when son in my daily life . He's the one raise my strength . Now when i need son , he's didn't there for me . My heart is totally broken , i can't fix that anymore . No need for me to fix my heart anymore because i'm already half-dead and i'm dying . I'm so lonely . No one comfort me . Just now on 7.15p.m. i went to watch movie 'AVATAR' with my cousin and that movie is interesting . On monday in the afternoon , son will go back to KK . How i'm gonna contact with son ? Son , please reply my message or answer my call , i begging you =( . I know you read my text message , i can feel that . Just please reply my message , everyday i searching for you . I got something need to say to you . Don't make me like this , i already enough suffer . You knew i was sick and everyday need to eat medicine to stop the pain . So please reply my message .