Sugar

In this year school holiday , the thing that i do is learn to bake muffin , cookies , pie and lot more . i learn to bake by myself . i love baking , i guess is in my blood . everyday i find recipes on the internet or in the book . much to learn but i never get tired or get bored of it . hope one day i can bake for the people that i love and care . i will bake for my family , my bestie , Son , my special someone . if i live long enough , i will bake for them but sadly ..... move on to my story about baking , the most i love to bake is cheese cake and chocolate cake . i addicted to it . omg ! hehe .. my chef idol is Anna Olson , i watch his every shows , never missed it . hehe .. Now i need to find some time to hang out with my bestie , i miss my bestie ... but don't worry i will meet them on 12 september 2009 ..

Rain

rain
rain, rain, rain heal my heart that is broken apart
rain, rain, rain up above from the skies
rain, rain, rain pour here and clean my soul
rain, rain, rain there will be rain here, there will be rain there
rain, rain, rain wash away my pain
rain, rain i will do anything for you to cover my tears

Habit

Hmmm ... Let me blogging about my bad habit .
My very first habits is when time for bed i need my bear blanket , if not i can't sleep . then i need to bite handkerchief till morning if sun already up , the handkerchief that i bite will be wet , hehe .. ewww .. smelly . then i like to bite finger nail , this cause when i was a kid , when i get panic i will bite my finger nail . But now when i fell boring i will bite finger nail , if my mom see me doing that she will scold me . huhu . i need to change my bad habits ... my friend also help me to stop that habits . now i get less bite finger nail . hehe . later i will never bite my finger nail again . People says that a person who always bite finger nail is a person who always thinking . I don't that is true or not . what else to blog about ?

Picture Of Myself

Here is my picture for everyone to see
No one else looks exactly like me
My hair

, my eyes are different you see
My smile, my laughter are special to me
My nose, my mouth, hands and feet
make my features quite unique
So when you look upon my face
and see my "Angelshine"
You will know that I am special
because its all.l.l mine.

My Feeling

When I am sad, I feel like crying. (rub eyes)
When I am proud, I feel like trying. (head held high)
When I feel curious, I want to know. (look up, wondering)
When I'm impatient, I want to go! (cross arms, tap foot)
When I feel angry, I look this way. (angry look)
When I feel happy, I smile all day. (big smile)
When I am puzzled, I make a shrug. (shrug shoulders)
When I feel loving, I want to hug. (hug yourself)

Baby , Don't Break My Heart Slow

i like the way you wanted me
Every night for so long baby
I like the way you needed me
Every time things got rocky

I was believing in you
Was I mistaken do you mean
Do you mean what you say
When you say our love could last forever

But I'd rather you be mean than love and lie
I'd rather hear the truth and have to say goodbye
I'd rather take a blow at least then I would know
But baby don't you break my heart slow

I like the way you'd hold me
Every night for so long baby
I like the way you'd sing to me
Every time things got rocky

Problem.Think.Open

PROBLEM --- I got bad issue with my BF , he get mad when i did't contact him . I admit that was true and i'm sorry . It was accident , i got no pocket money for my hp credit , if i ask from my parents , they get mad with me . But i always get money from my grandma . hehe . Shhhhsssss ,don't tell anyone . hehehe . am i a good grand daughter or bad grand daughter ? till now , still not yet settle and my BF say relax then we will settle but when ? all he can say is relax , relax and relax . and now he did't want to on his hp anymore . what a shit ! i will settle it ASAP ! wish me luck .

THINK --- Now i need think what the best thing for me . Which ways will make me happy all the time ? i already found that way . When i'm with Son , i feel very happy and laugh all the time . No tears or sadness just happy hour . Just like old time with Mr.Panda but that was a history . I will thrown away my memories about Mr.Panda .

OPEN --- I need to learn open my heart again and accept new things like Son says to me . I will try my best . now i open my eyes and see the world and the world is just awesome . Finally , i get back some part of myself . My heart starting to heal back and i hope my heart will never fall down again for the second time .


p/s : Son , Thank Q for your advice for me . I really appreciate it and i will always remember it . By the way , i won't forget my promise to you . 

Zero

I don't want to blog today . I have no idea . By the way , i have some new shirt and accessories for my closet . a peace tshirt and miss trouble tshirt . i always wanted a peace tshirt , finally i got it but still not enough . still searching for more peace tshirt . Today , what a bored day , miss SON !  I also buy some new shirt and pant for my dad because he always complaint no new shirt . haha ! i dinner at PH , so full feel like want to thrown out . ewww .. My relationship with my BF quite good . Finally i can forget some of my past about MR.PANDA . huhu ! so hard to do that , but forget him day by day . i hope there is no thing around me that can make me flash about mr.panda . Pray for me that i can success . 

A Place In This World

I don't know what I want, so don't ask me
Cause I'm still trying to figure it out
Don't know what's down this road, I'm just walking
Trying to see through the rain coming down
Even though I'm not the only one
Who feels the way I do

I'm alone, on my own, and that's all I know
I'll be strong, I'll be wrong, oh but life goes on
I'm just a girl, trying to find a place in
This world

Got the radio on, my old blue jeans
And I'm wearing my heart on my sleeve
Feeling lucky today, got the sunshine
Could you tell me what more do I need
And tomorrow's just a mystery, oh yeah
But that's ok

Maybe I'm just a girl on a mission
But I'm ready to fly by myself .

Decision

I already make my own decision .. Me and Mr.panda is just a history , no use for me to remember Mr.panda anymore . Only will make me cry at late night . No use for me to keep wishing to a wishing star about Mr.panda , he will never come back anymore . Now for me to start a new life without Mr.panda . Like Son say , no use de . haha !

Should or Not ?

hello again BLOG ! hmm ... should i force mysefl to love my new BF , but i'm the one suffer right ? should i break up with my new BF but i feel pity for him ? haiyo . dunno what to do .. BLANK ! I got a friend , but let me call him 'SON' hehe .. He told me to forget Mr.Panda , throw all of my memories with Mr.panda . huhu . Where do i get the strength to forget so much sweet memories with Mr.panda ? This is the part i hate in chapter LOVE , that is BREAK UP AND FORGET MEMORIES . OMG ! Son , help me lol . All Son need to do is knock my head then forget everything but Son said no use if knock head but use heart . How oo ? I so tired of my life . I need to find my new life , all i need is the other side of the door . At there i can find back every pieces of me or my heart . huhu ! Feel just like want to DIE ! Since i knew Son , i often laugh too hard . For few month i never laugh like that . Miss my old life but sadly i need to run away from that life since that unexpected day . I AM SO TIRED ! Tired of what ? Tired of swimming and jump . the back of my body full of pain . Feel like the bone already broken . haha !

Jump then Fall

i lost my direction . Don't where to go . Everything not the same anymore . I can't go back to my life before and cannot start a new life anymore . I'm stuck forever . Wonder why Mr.panda doing , thinking ??? Wish he were beside me . huh .. he not longer mine , i lost my true love . i know true love come once never come twice . now is all gone and fade away . I can't heal myself . What should i do ??? I need to find every part of me but where to start and how ??? Why i get a fate like this ??? I must be patient to this fate . When night fall down , i cry a lot because thinking about mr.panda . When rain fall down , i walk into the rain to cover my teardrops . I could go back to every laugh but i don't want go there anymore because don't have meaning for me anymore . Now what i do is be Dr.Love . haha . Now i have a new BF but he can't change mr.panda place in my heart . Never ever . Deeply in my heart still love mr.panda . Maybe mr.panda don't love me anymore . But nevermind , just let me know what i feel in my heart . Because no one know what i feel . If there is someone know what i feel , thank you ! I don't need sympathy from anyone .

Fourth Letter From Mr.Panda

The letter that MR.PANDA wrote for me when we still together .

( I LOVE YOU )

Bby..

B ingin bby tau bahawa yg b sgt sayangkan bby !! sgt cintakan bby !! Bby.. B trus trang la yahrr..sebenarnya ,,hya bby jak yg brada dihati b & nama bby tlah terukir d'hati b ney .. B trus trang .. B xblh khlangan bby .. xboleh hdup tnpa bby .. xboleh tinggalkan bby .. B xdpt bygkn bagaimana sengsaranya hidup b jika bby tiada d'sisi b :-( .. B mohon rayuan dae bby bahawa jgn sesekali pergi dae cc b ato b'jauhan dae b .. jgn !! :-( B harap,, hbgn kta akn b'kekalan hgga hembusan nafas b yg t'akhir .. dan jika nyawa b duluan d'ambil dae bby .. B mohon supaya bby teruskan k'hdpan bby . B xmau tgk bby dlm k'daan t'seksa ato sengsara .. B hya mau lihat bby dalam k'daan yg aman 'n' bahagia ya :D .. one more .. Apa yg telah k'ta lakukan , etu smua akn brada dlm m'mry ingatan B buat slamanya .. Satu hari nanti .. B pasti akan melamar bby.. Bby tggu jk ya !! hehe :D B pasti!!!! satu hari nanti .. kta pasti akn Bhagia buat slamanya ummuahmauh3*!! I Love You !!

Bby jdi pmpuan yg sjati ya - Blh kn??

jga prangai spt prangai pmpuan ..

pdulikan apa org kta :) ..

yg pntg kta Bhagia..